Category Archives: Family Issues and Interpersonal Relationships

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Networking & The Hero’s Journey: Overcoming Your Fears

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Making connections and learning to network is a vital part of any self-development process. As part of the hero’s journey, it’s necessary to encounter other people who could play an essential role in your growth – which is where networking comes in. Whether you are trying to increase the number of clients you have, are pushing for a promotion at work, or even just looking to create stronger, better relationships with those that can help you, a little networking with the right people can go a long way.

 

The trouble is, not everyone is comfortable with the idea, and the prospect of standing in a roomful of strangers making small talk is a nightmare for many. There are some who love it, of course, and to whom networking is a natural act – and it’s these people who tend to get ahead in life, even if they are less well-equipped or skilled than their introverted rivals.

 

It’s one of those things in life that isn’t fair, but nothing is going to change soon. In short, you have to overcome your fear of networking and get out there and make a noise – so here are some ideas for you to get started.

 

Research attendees

 

It’s OK to do a little research on the attendees of a particular event to find out who they are and what they do. Take a look and see what you can find out about your prospective contacts, to ensure that there is a valid reason for attending, whether for business or self-development reasons. LinkedIn is the ideal place for this, and there are plenty of event sites that include listings of attendees and guest speakers. You might even find that setting up an event group can help you meet people online before you arrive.

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Sharpen up your small talk

 

Small talk doesn’t come naturally to most people, but it’s a learned skill – anyone can do it if they practice enough. It’s a good idea to catch up on some industry news before you go to a business event, and also some general stories from the newspaper. It’s advisable to keep politics, religion and other potentially awkward subjects off the table when you meet people for the first time, so look around for five or six other topics you can use as conversation starters.

 

The open-ended technique

 

OK, so you have built up enough confidence to start some conversations. But, all you ever get are blunt ‘yes’ or ‘no’ answers, which leaves you feeling even more uncomfortable than you were before. So, practice asking open-ended rather than closed questions. Give people a chance to expand on answers, and you will find the conversation starts to flow naturally.

 

Target groups

 

It can be overwhelming for shy, nervous, or introverted people to enter a room full of people and get talking straight away. But it doesn’t take much to get involved in a discussion. Look for groups of people talking, rather than individuals – when you approach a group, one of them is more likely to offer their hand and welcome you to the discussion.

 

Start your own networking night

 

Starting a networking night yourself is a great way to put yourself front and centre in people’s minds. And it’s a lot easier to deal with your fears, too, as people will come to you to do the talking. Yes, you will be feeling a lot of pressure to arrange a great night, but not all networking events have to be full-on – perhaps you could design a gentler occasion that better suits your personality, and will attract others that feel similar?

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Hold a golf event or function

 

Golf and business go together hand in hand. Many a deal has been struck on the fairways, and having a focus for the event is a great way to take the pressure off you. The great thing about golf is that you get a lot of time to spend with particular individuals, and it’s a more intimate occasion than holding a huge party in a hotel function room. You can buy some golf trophies to add a little competitive spice, and even arrange a regular event which targets different types of attendee or client.

 

Be wary of alcohol

 

There is often alcohol at business events, and when you are feeling nervous, it can be tempting to go for some Dutch courage. Try to avoid overindulging, however, as it will backfire. A small drink at the beginning of the event will help you relax a little, but if you overdo it, people will notice – and it can be incredibly damaging to your personal brand.

 

Be nice

 

It’s easy for your nerves to get the better of you when you are attending a networking event. It’s why you see so many serious faces at these types of conferences – everyone is so desperate to make a professional impression that they end up looking cold, stern, and unfriendly. So, be nice – and smile. It will instantly mark you out from the other attendees, and more people will want to come and say hello and find out more about you and your business. Friendliness costs nothing, and there are plenty of people who actively seek out a winning smile at networking events.

 

Enthusiasm wins

 

One thing you must do at a networking event is to be enthusiastic about what you do and why you are there. This can be harder than you might think, especially if you don’t like praising yourself, or feel worried about discussing problems and issues you might be having. The trouble is, if you don’t wear your passion for what you do on your sleeve, no one else will believe you have it either – and they will instantly lose interest. If you are struggling with this tactic, concentrate on coming up with an enthusiastic one-line pitch which explains what you do and why you are there – and always say it with a smile on your face.

 

Have a goal

 

Finally, have a goal in mind before you go to a networking event – something like collecting as many names as possible, or talking to a particular individual whose work in self-development you admire. Doing something like this will force you to get out there and be chatty and communicative. If you set yourself targets in life, you are more likely to achieve them, and networking is no different to anything else. Good luck at your next networking event!

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Clever Methods For Raising Intelligent Kids

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All parents should want to raise the most intelligent kids possible. Failure to do that could mean they rely on you for money most of their lives. That is not ideal, and you’ll feel disappointed that you didn’t try harder. Thankfully, children are simple creatures, and it’s easy to encourage them to learn. You just have to find methods and techniques that inspire them. You can also use incentives to ensure they are focused and dedicated to achieving their goals. The ideas on this page are here to point you in the right direction. At the end of the day, you know your kids better than us. So, you just need to employ some common sense.

 

Teach them to design and build their toys

 

Thanks to 3D printing technology, it’s now easier than ever to design and build toys at home. Your kids are entering a digital world where they’ll need to become savvy if they want to earn a decent wage. So, it makes sense for you to get them started as soon as possible. You can show them how to create 3D toys using nothing more than their computer and a specialist device. Thankfully, 3D printers have come down in price considerably during the last twelve months. You can now get hold of a product for your home without breaking the bank. Teaching your kids how to use that technology is guaranteed to benefit them in the future. It’ll make them smarter too.

 

Take lots of educational trips

 

Lots of kids spend their free time playing on games consoles or listening to music. While that’s fine, a well-rounded individual also needs some culture. With that in mind, you should plan lots of educational trips when you take time off work. Maybe you could visit some historical sites where your kids can learn about the past? Perhaps there is a science museum in your state where they could learn about the universe? The possibilities are endless and only limited by your imagination. Just search Google for “the best things to do in wherever” and take a look at the results.

 

Reward your child for working hard

 

As we mentioned at the start of this post, incentives are vital for children. You need to let them know they always get rewards if they work hard. That will help to build them into active adults with a good work ethic. Just don’t make the mistake of paying them for their efforts. The last thing you want to do is create a child that’s money-mad. Instead, you should make their most-loved meal or treat them to a movie. You could even take them away on a special trip. If you do that, they are more likely to try to impress you in the future. They will also learn that they don’t get anything for free in this life, and they have to make an effort.

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You should have enough ideas now to improve your parenting technique. So, start creating some plans for 2017, and ensure you make the most of the summer. Spending time outdoors is also important for children because it helps to keep them grounded. Considering that, a camping trip during the school holidays might make sense. Whatever you decide to do, we wish you all the luck in the world.

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Make New Friends When You Move Away

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There comes a time when we all have to move house. For some of us, it is a decision we have made (such as moving out of our parents’, wanting to upgrade to a bigger house or downsize to a smaller one, to move away for college or university, or to move away for a job) and for some of us it is something we have had to do, for reasons such as financial problems, or a breakdown in a relationship.

 

It can be a stressful business, moving house. First of all, you may want to put the property up for sale and that can be a huge undertaking which requires a lot of paperwork, calculations and meetings with professionals such as accountants, financial advisors or solicitors. Then, when the house gets bought, you have to move everything out which requires a lot of time and could be a heavy expense if you hire a removals company. Of course, you can always sell the things in your home – this means you will earn money and won’t have to take as much with you into your new home making the task much less arduous and more streamlined.

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When we do move away, especially if it is to a new county, state or even a new country, an aspect of our new lives which we don’t put that much thought into is our social lives. We may have left our friends and family behind, where we used to live, so that means we have to go out and try to forge new relationships with people, who at first, may be strangers.

 

If you have moved away for college or university, it may be a good idea to attend as many groups and join as many clubs as you can. This is a great way to make lasting relationships. You could talk about your scholarship with John Monash if you’re in an intellectual club, or even talk about the world of sport if you decide to join a football team.

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Another great way of making new friends – whether you have away for university or not – is to go out and mingle and socialize. Going to bars, pubs, cafes and night-classes is a positive way of doing this as you will be in new surroundings, talking to new people who you may not have thought about interacting with before and, of course, you will have a great time doing so. Night-classes reaches out to this point more than the others as you will be learning new skills (yoga, I.T, English, Maths etc) with like-minded people who probably attend the class for the same reasons you do.

 

Moving away can be a difficult and stressful decision to make, but once you embrace it you will quickly ease into your new life and the new surroundings in your new home. Whatever your reason for moving away to a new place, ensure you are ready for a fresh start and are prepared for what can be a difficult time.

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Suspect Your Partner of Cheating? Here are 4 Tell Tale Signs

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Ah, it’s a new year, and what with all those Christmas work parties and New Year’s shenanigans lowering people’s inhibitions, it’ll be little surprise that a few people who were once in committed relationships have had their head turned. It’s a sad fact of life that unfortunately some of us have to go through from time to time. But cheating partners very rarely volunteer their indiscretions openly to their other halves, so how do they get found out? Partners who think they may have been cheated on have often turned to detective agencies such as Bond Rees Detectives to confirm their suspicions, which is a good idea if one’s suspicions are strong but obvious evidence is not present. However, subtle signs may be present and are identifiable without needing to be a detective. Try as they might to conceal their secrets, there’s always tell-tale trails that they leave behind.

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Reduced Sex Life

Now, we’re not suggesting every partner who appears to be less interested in sex than they once were is cheating. There are many reasons why a person’s sex drive might be reduced. However, a change in the bedroom might just be enough to merit suspicions. If you talk to them about it and they have no clear explanation or get defensive, it might be worth paying closer attention to what other things changed.

Shifty Behaviour

No person is capable of having their cake and eating it too. A cheating partner might hope that they’re able to come home and act as if nothing has happened, but they’ll always be tripped up by their conflicting emotions and secret life eventually. They’ll act different; nervous, suspicious, defensive, all the actions of a person with something to hide, so keep a close eye on the details they’re providing and the way they’re acting. Of course, you could be correct in thinking that needing surveillance tips is a sign that this relationship is not working, but it might turn out to be nothing in the end!

Late Nights/Early Rises

You know the routine of your partner. You know what time they’re due in and out of work, how often they’re required to stay late or get in early. You’ve been with them for some time and you know all of this as well as they do. That’s why you’ll be extra aware of any changes to the norm. If a partner is suddenly finding reasons to leave the house earlier than normal and arriving home later, then it might not just be a new project they’re working on. Of course, if they’re completely open and are not exhibiting any other suspicious traits then there’s little to worry about – but spending more time out of the home is a massive red flag when combined with other strange goings on.

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Excuses to Find Time Alone

They feel guilty. They need to talk to their new partner. They know that they’ll say something stupid if they spend too much time alone with you. All of these reasons will make your partner want to be as far away from you as possible, even when they’re not doing something scandalous with their side partner. This means there could be hanging out in separate rooms from you when you’re both at home or suggesting that you take two cars instead of one to events you’re going to. It’s an illogical thought process, which means it’s worth investigating!

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Resolutions to Make That Will Actually Enrich Your Life

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If you are thinking of making resolutions in the new year, it sometimes feels like you are setting yourself up for failure. So often we fail at making them work and after a few weeks in we have completely forgotten about them. Things, like losing weight or running a marathon, are quite general. They aren’t specific enough to get things done. Plus, it doesn’t deal with the nitty-gritty about how things got that way in the first place. But there are certain things that you can resolve to do that are much less likely to fail. So have a read of these below and perhaps pick one or two to choose from. You might be surprised at just how much they might change your life.

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Improve Life in Your Community

 

When the place you live is a happier place to be, then it will make it a nicer place for you to live in. So even small things like saying hi to your neighbors can make a massive difference. Greet your neighbors instead of ignoring them or just nodding. When we speak and get to know them, it will make the area that you live a much nicer place to be. It can also be quite contagious. They are much more likely to go about and do the same. When we know our neighbors better, we have a better support system in emergencies. It makes going to local events easier and will help us to enjoy our homes and where we live better.

 

Change Things You Dislike

 

If there are certain things that you dislike about your life, then it is time to change them. If you find that you are unhappy, then think about the reasons why you might be. Then make practical changes to correct them. It might be that you need to forgive someone, as you’ve been holding onto something for too long. Changing jobs could help perhaps, or you might consider something like life coaching. If you feel that you need more than just you to get over a certain issue, then you could consider the latter with someone like Darren Christopher Rowland. Then you can move on and make your life happier than it has been in a long time.

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Make Eye Contact

 

This goes for everyone that we come into contact with. But when you give someone eye contact, it makes the interaction much more meaningful. We are all busy, so it might be hard to listen to our kids and make the dinner. But just take a time out and listen to them and then make the dinner. It will make them feel much more appreciated, and you won’t feel as rushed or busy when you do things one at a time.

 

Speak to Family

 

You might be familiar with the phrase that blood is thicker than water. Keeping in touch with family is one of the best things that you can do. It will benefit more than just you and make your life much more enriched. So call, visit and arrange things with the family that you have left.

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You Can Overcome Failure In Various Aspects Of Your Life

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Everyone fails from time to time, but some people are hit way harder than others. Failure can come in all shapes and sizes, but remember, the most important thing is how you deal with the failure and overcome it, that’s what truly matters. There’s nothing wrong with dusting yourself off, getting back up, and trying again. Here are some varying aspects in life you could fail at, and how best to try again.

Failure In Business

Happiness in business is quite had to ascertain, and when you realise that 90% of new startups fail, it becomes clear just how hard business success is, that in itself should give you some reassurances if you’ve failed. However, just because you failed does not mean you or your business ideas are constantly doomed. Instead, try to learn from it, avoid the same mistakes next time around. The lessons you can learn from failing, from whatever reasons, will make you a better person and help you become a better businessperson in future endeavours. You need to search and find a lesson, take something from the failure and apply it next time around. Set yourself, be adamant you’ll succeed and keep pushing, only this way can you overcome failure. Start again, just keep pouring your drive and influence into new business ideas and plans, it’s all about self motivation, if you can get a business up and running again you’ll know what to look out for to keep it afloat.

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Failure In Education

If you didn’t get the degree you wanted or failed at getting one altogether try not to let it get to you, there are many people who failed university and still managed to make huge successes out of their lives, again it’s how you stand up despite failure. Failing college overall is of course way worse than simply failing a semester, but you need to pick yourself up and analyse your life. If what you wanted to do really centred around the obtaining of a degree then re-enroll. Admit you messed up and get straight back into it. Sometimes you can make a deal with your head of school and only resit part of the year, providing you’ve got some good grades the first time around, this can stop you having to resit the whole course again and could save you a year or two of your life. Learn from your mistakes and study more, even hire a tutor for extra help if you need to. If what you want from life does not require a degree, then perhaps it’s time to move on, and it’ll save you a tonne of debt. There are other types of training courses available for people who are smart but don’t have degrees, so get researching and stay positive, as we have seen, it can be done.

Failure In Sport

So you wanted to become a big star, but it hasn’t worked out. Either you’ve picked up one injury too many, or your talents simply aren’t up to scratch compared to the rest of the people in your area. Failure may not be the end for you. You need to pick yourself up, either get into the gym, book sessions in with a physio and get out on the field training every day to improve, or take a long hard think and ponder whether this is exactly what you wanted to do, because if you haven’t got the drive to get out and work, you likely don’t want it enough. Think about other passions and pastimes you may have, start diverting more of your time into them and before long you’ll have a new direction in life. Dealing with sporting failure is one of the hardest to overcome because often there is no way back, especially if you’re in your early twenties.

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Failure In Marriage

If your marriage has failed then first you need to take a deep breath, and understand it wasn’t all your fault, it’s split 50/50. Of course some people realise the failure eventually leads to happiness, and it’s from this you should draw solace. If the marriage failed, for whatever reason, then it wasn’t right. It’ll feel awful at first, especially if you didn’t necessarily want it to end. But time is the best healer, and before long you’ll be back on your feet. The power of positivity rules here, you need to get outside with your family and friends, meet new people, try new things, and before long months would have passed and you’ll be happy it all ended. Granted, it’s a horrible thing to go through, but just remember if it’s going to make you happier it needs to be done.

Career Failure

One of the most common failures is that of a career failure. Perhaps you thought you would be higher in the company you work for, perhaps you thought you’d be head of department in a school instead of just a teacher? There are two things to consider, firstly, changing careers, and secondly, whether you’ve been pushing hard enough. If you have, then step back and if you’re not happy leave, your happiness comes first. If you haven’t, then ask for a meeting with your supervisor and tell him exactly what you want and when you want it by. Be assertive, if you’re good at your job they may give you a raise just to keep you at the business instead of lose you to a competitor. Sometimes you won’t get noticed unless you start shouting about it. Don’t see it as a failure if you’re passed over for promotion, just keep going, apply again using the previous rounds experience to guide you forward. Start applying for similar jobs in different businesses or fields, doing this can get you a better pay grade or more responsibility, all things you can put on your resume.  The key in the career game is not to get bogged down, because if you do life will fly past and before you know it it’ll be too late.

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Be The Change You Want To See In The New Year

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With new year fast approaching, there’s no better time to look towards changing the way you live. We’re going to look at new year resolutions you can make to ensure you live a fuller life. We all want to be happier, and making a few changes can go a long way towards that goal. Take the time, while making your resolutions, to consider what changes would help you. Here are a few things worth considering.

BE KIND

Kindness goes a long way. Treating people around you with kindness will help you to be kinder to yourself. Instead of walking past the homeless, take the time to stop and chat. If you aren’t comfortable giving money, why not ask if there’s anything you can buy, such as food, etc? Be kinder to the people in your life too. All too often we take our loved ones for granted and forget to value what we’ve got. If you’ve been neglecting your partner, make more of an effort to spend quality time together. If you’ve been short-tempered with your family, change that behavior. It’s surprising how different the world can be when we take the time to practice kindness.

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GET INVOLVED

Getting involved in your community is a type of kindness, but it’s much more involved. Find out what initiatives are in your community, and get involved. Knowing you’re doing what you can will help towards your feeling of satisfaction. Not to mention, it’ll be a significant contribution to the schemes you offer your time to. Is there a local food bank you can donate to? Or, maybe you would like to volunteer. Is there a care home that needs befrienders to spend time with the residents? Think through what you would like to do and find out if your community offers the chance to do it!

ENVIRONMENTAL AWARENESS

Becoming more environmentally aware is another positive change. The environment is ever in danger, yet we rarely take the time to change bad habits. Use the new year to turn your attention to a greener planet. Learn about environmental issues and make positive changes. Simple things like eating the food you buy can help, as can changing to solar power using companies such as Semper Solaris. Or, something as easy as walking instead of driving can make a huge difference. Not to mention, it’ll make you feel better.

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MINDFULNESS

As well as spreading your kindness outwards, it’s important to be kind to yourself. Practicing mindfulness will help you become more aware of how you treat yourself. It’ll help you make your own happiness. We are often more unforgiving of ourselves than anybody, so mindfulness can be a wonderful practice to get to grips with. Maybe spend a little time meditating each day, or start a yoga practice. If you don’t think you have time for either of those, keep things simple. Even taking the time to appreciate what’s around you will make a huge difference. Learn to accept yourself in the new year!

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How To Have THAT Conversation About Ageing (And What To Do After It Too!)

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Talking about ageing with your family can be far from easy. From your perspective, it can be upsetting. After all, most of us are very emotionally close to our family members, and the thought of them leaving us can cause trauma. On the other hand, it can cause your aging relative themselves to become distressed or even offended. The current aging population are very proud and some of them will be offended if you try to offer them extra care – even if you mean well. This is why it is vital that you approach all topics tactfully and in a calm environment. All of us age and that can’t be helped. But what we do have control of is how we deal with it and what measures we put in place to make sure that our lives, and the lives of our relatives, remain as good as they can be.

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Maintaining independence

Due to various health problems that can arise in the elderly, many older people are unfortunately unable to continue to live independently. This can be a daunting prospect for someone who has been independent all of their life, so approach the topic with caution. Essentially, you will need to decide, with your relative, what the plan should be if they are no longer able to live completely alone. There are quite a few different options here. One that some families take is moving their ageing loved one right into their own homes. But this is not always the best option, as it can lead to family conflict and a disrupted home life for you as well. It may be worth considering a Live -In Care Company who will be able to care for your loved one professionally. Plus, this can allow your relative to stay in their own home too – something many seniors feel passionate about.

Keeping healthy

A lot of older people want to try to deny the fact that their health is deteriorating. But unfortunately, there are no two ways about it. We are simply more prone to illnesses, such as dementia and osteoporosis, the older we get. There are, however, measures we can put in place to help delay the onset of such illnesses. Make sure your relative is eating well – lots of fruit and vegetables, and normal amounts of candy or alcohol. As people age, they may not always be able to cook for themselves anymore. So make sure they always have healthy food on hand that they can snack on, and offer to help them with cooking an evening meal.

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Keeping active

Keeping active in old age relates to both physical and mental activity. It is vital that you encourage your elderly relative to keep walking or even doing sports if they are able to. Choose low-intensity exercises to recommend to them, such as pilates or golf. Walking soccer even exists these days, to help ageing soccer players keep enjoying their game. If a class doesn’t exist near you, why not set one up yourself? As far as mental capacity goes, being socialized helps to keep the brain sharp. So continue to visit your elderly relative on a regular basis, and encourage them to join a local community group where they can gather with old friends too.

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