Category Archives: Communication

Unknown's avatar

What are some Good Traits to Have?

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Lots of times, I’ve been in situations where I didn’t know what to say, or whether to say anything at all, or where my timing was just off, or I just felt plain awkward, even if I was just standing there. And, from my perspective, it just seems as if everyone else knows what they are doing.

So, in thinking about this, I’ve identified three traits I wish I had. I’ve also added them to my Page of Lists on this site.

The first of these is, knowing what and what not to say, or whether I should say anything at all.

This may be the best trait I could have. Oh, there have been times when I did say the right thing or when I did keep my mouth shut for the better. But oftentimes, even when I said the right thing, or rightly kept my mouth shut, I was often unsure if I did do the right thing. It would be great to always know. The benefits of such a trait start with the fact that I’d be much less likely to inadvertently insult someone or simply say the wrong thing in a situation such as a job interview or when talking to a car sales rep. Also, I would know when I could negotiate, present something, or sell something,  and when I shouldn’t even try to.

Next, is having great timing.

This is almost as good as knowing what to say. It would be nice to decide to take that different route when it’s not going to be clogged with traffic, or to get to the checkout area just as a new check stand is opening so you can be first in line.

Last is, looking good no matter what.

I’ve often felt awkward in some situations, sometimes just by being there. It’s that feeling like you’re the only one who hasn’t a clue and everyone else looks like they know what they’re doing. This is especially true when thrust into a new situation, such as starting a new job. You hear things like, “reg-E”, “30aught6”, or “MA2784”, and wonder what the heck is being talked about. And you get the feeling that others expect you to have known this from day one. Or at least it seems that way. It’s quite possible that it’s me feeling this way and that others aren’t really perceiving me as a “know nothing”, though In some cases I knew some were seeing me as such.

I guess what I’m really wanting here is the ability to not feel as if I know nothing in such a situation.

So anyway, these are just my votes for the top 3 traits I would want to have or have to a greater degree.

If you like what you’ve read here, please let others know of this post, blog, and site.

And thanks for reading!

Unknown's avatar

If It’s Good, Let Them Know Too!

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Oftentimes, when you hear someone talk about customer service they’ve received or a product that they’ve purchased, you often hear the bad side. Not always, but probably more often than not. And most of us, if we do have a bad or negative experience with a product or service, we are more likely to tell about it.

To be sure, you will hear about good service and products, too, but I think you’re more likely to hear the negative more than the positive. And what’s the possible effect of this?

That fewer people in the service industry will go the extra mile, or even do their jobs as required, and good products and features will disappear as positive feedback is little or non-existent.

Now, this effect is usually long-term and not readily apparent, but I believe it is there. So, in my case, I do try to give positive feedback whenever I have the chance to review or give an opinion on a good service or a good product that I’ve purchased.

When I purchase something online, find that I am satisfied with it, and I get an e-mail requesting a review of the product, I submit the review and make sure to point out what I like about the product. And in the case of someone who gets tips, such as a waiter or waitress, I add to the tip if the service was above average or they went the extra mile. It makes my day as well as theirs.

This helps to ensure that the service person will continue to provide the excellent service they’ve provided and that the company or store will try to continue to carry that great product. And it’s just the right thing to do.

After all, if they provided a lousy service or product, most of us would certainly let them know it. We should be just as eager to let them know what a great job they’ve done or how great their product is when our expectations are exceeded as well.

Be sure to mention those positives, too!

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And thanks for reading!  🙂

Unknown's avatar

Independence is Fine for The Right Reasons

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I am politically independent for several reasons, but to be independent just to be independent is not one of them. I don’t believe in being a rebel without a cause.

Whenever a politician who is, or at least comes across, as an independent thinker, enters the race, it grabs my attention. But, does it mean I’m hooked? No, it means only that I take notice.

They still have to make their case!

Why am I drawn to independent candidates? It’s because most candidates from either camp try to adhere to all the planks of their camp.

I, on the other hand, don’t believe in all the planks of either camp, in fact, I believe in some of the planks of both camps.

So, neither camp completely fills the bill for me, as I feel that each demands that its followers adhere to all of the planks in the camp, some of which I don’t agree with.

So, what do I look for in an independent candidate? First, it doesn’t matter to me what party they belong to or if they are affiliated with any party or not, so long as they are willing to think on their own and, if they do belong to a party, that they’re willing to challenge the party on some issues.

But, it’s more than just a willingness to call out the status quo. They also have to have ideas of their own. Too often, including this time around, I’ve seen candidates who tout themselves as independent thinkers, come out with no solutions or ideas of their own, and in some cases, only attacking the other candidates and the media for simply questioning them.

I remember an election year in the past where a new party was, …attempted?, to be formed, called the “Reform Party”. Well, it was touted as the answer to the other two parties, but all it was, was chaos. They never really brought any new ideas, except to say they were an alternative to the other two parties. It went nowhere.

Yes, like many of you, I do want to see a challenge to the two parties, but it needs to be a credible challenge. Such as a candidate who not only points out where the other two parties go wrong, but also offers up solutions, and communicates to the people of both sides that they don’t have to fear an independent candidate who demonstrates that he or she can still lead despite the lack of party affiliation, and can communicate the message of “The people first, party second.”

So, what does an independent candidate need to do to have a chance of real success, both for him or herself as well as for the people?

  1. Yes, point out how the status quo is not working and attack the issues and failed solutions, not silly things as to whether a moderator or interviewer asked a supposed “gotcha” or unfair question, or whether an opponent hugged someone from the opposing party. It’s important for candidates to remember that, in order to work towards a solution, people from opposing sides often have to work together and it’s easier to be friendly while doing so, especially in times of crisis. And, as for supposed unfair media questions, candidates must remember that the real world will throw these kinds of questions at them all the time!
  2. If the candidate is a member of a major party, they must be willing to go against their party if their position on an issue is at odds with the party line.
  3. The independent candidate must be willing to talk to media and the people on both sides of the political spectrum.
  4. They need to convey the message that they can work with both sides to a viable solution but not be fence-sitters or flip floppers. That does not mean they cannot change their position if it’s for the right reasons, however!
  5. They have to convince the people to not follow their parties blindly, but to really think things through. This can be really tough, but if a candidate has the charisma, I believe it can be done.
  6. Probably not last, but very important is, they must have viable solutions to problems, especially to those they point out! Too often, independent candidates end up being viewed as not having any substance. Sure, in the beginning, they often draw a significant following, especially from those who are really fed up with the status quo and the major parties. But they often only go so far, and support stops growing, or even wanes, as people see that the candidate is offering no solutions but instead only keeps pointing out the same problems over and over.

So, this is just my opinion, but, I do ask that, during campaign season, you really, really, evaluate the candidates for everything, not just a few sound bites.

If you like what you’ve read here, please let others know of this post, blog, and site.

And thanks for reading!  🙂

Unknown's avatar

So, How Do I Like My Smart Phone After 6 Months?

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Well, I’ve had my Smart Phone for 6 months now. It’s my first. So, how do I like it, and smart phones in general?

I have to say, so far, so good! And, as a matter of fact, I’ve gotten used to what my phone can do for me now.

First, and probably most important, are the apps that I can get, for free. Yes, there are some you have to pay for, but so far, I haven’t needed those. Most companies that provide apps will provide them for free, since many of them want you to come to them or buy from them. And the free app acts as free advertising for them as well.

Apps are really great, as they can often allow easy access to finding things on the go, and comparing prices. They can also alert you.  If your favorite store is having a sudden sale, and you have their app, you may get an alert from them.

Apps can also help in monitoring information and controlling things from afar. I have an app that allows me to check to see if my burglar alarm is set, and, if it’s not, I can set it from my phone!

I also have an app for locating theaters and checking what movies are available, where they’re playing, and I can even purchase tickets, which would be waiting for me when I get there! It’s also the same with many apps for eating places, including many of your favorites!

And if I don’t know where there is?

I have Google Maps, which can mark the location and tell me how to get there, too! This came standard with my phone, and most smart phones will come with a set of pre-installed apps, such as the Google set on Android phones.

Next, I have internet access. So, I can check up on e-mails and unclutter my inbox without having to wait until I get home! I can also surf the web. And, I can also watch YouTube videos, though these will use up lots of data and memory.

So, am I one of those who is constantly texting or checking my phone? No, I’m not. While you do have to try to avoid the urge to multitask with a smart phone, (Studies show multi-tasking makes one less effective!) I’ve never been a good multitasker and I refuse to bend to the idea that one must be doing everything at once all the time or be connected all the time!

But, if I’m waiting in a doctor’s office or am in some other “waiting situation”, then yes, I may check my e-mail inbox with my phone.

And finally, there are apps for free games, which are pretty good, too. I have Chess and also Checkers apps.

So, while I didn’t feel the need for a smart phone until a possible job situation came up which required one, I’ve seen that they can do a whole lot more than a “regular” cell phone can.

And best of all, you don’t need the latest, top of the line $700 I-phone or Android phone to get these great features! I got my phone, an LG Optimus Zone 2, for only $49! To see how, check out my post, “Again, Before Jumping In, Do Your Research! (Or how I got a $149 phone for just $49!)”.

So, if you’re thinking about a smart phone, you can get them with lots of features, and cheaply, too!

Good luck with your smart phone!

If you like what you’ve read here, please let others know of this post, blog, and site!

And thanks for reading!  🙂

Unknown's avatar

A Fathers’ Day (and Mothers’ Day, too) Message

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I’ve written before on how it is important to keep in touch and, with June 21st being Fathers’ Day, as well as the first day of summer, it’s especially important to stay in touch with your parents.

If they at least tried to be what a parent should be, it is important to keep in touch with them and to remember and contact them always, especially on special days like their birthdays and Mothers’ Day and Fathers’ Day.

Sure, you may have chafed under their rules in the past and you’ve certainly had your disagreements, as we all have, but chances are, you also had your good times and there have been times when they showed you how much they loved you, warts and all. And as the years pass, if you stop to really think about it, you’ll see they did more for you, in many ways, than you realize.

And, you don’t know how long you’ll have them, and even if they live to be 100 and you are 75, when they pass, it will still feel like it’s too soon.

So, On Father’s Day, call your father! And if he’s no longer with you, then call your mother! And vice versa on Mother’s Day!

You’ll be glad you did.

If you like what you’ve read here, please let others know of this post, blog, and site.

And thanks for reading!  🙂

Unknown's avatar

Don’t Let Time pass You By!

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I was talking to a friend recently, about my upcoming vacation and how I need to have my time off, not only to “get away” but also to see family and friends that I live far from and don’t get a chance to see every day.

I’ve always felt that it’s good to stay in touch, including face to face visits, even if there is great distance involved. But, I’ve known and met many people in my life that had relatives or friends that they haven’t seen in years, often due to the distance and busy lives.

Of course, it is understandable, in today’s fast-paced world, that time is scarce. The problem with this is that, many of us postpone that trip for later, “when I have more time…” which never seems to come. Before you know it, the friendship has faded, or worse, that great friend or relative has died.

I read an article once from a travel writer, who said that he was always postponing visiting his favorite uncle, due to his job. His uncle later died and the writer has regretted not visiting his uncle, for the sake of any job. Jobs come and go, but people cannot be replaced and once they’re gone, they’re gone!

I’ve lost several relatives and friends within the past year, but one thing I don’t regret is my having made time to visit them and to have them visit me.

Last Christmas, I met a relative who’d been out of the family circle for a long time, and I could see, without his telling me, that he most likely felt that he’d missed out on a lot, and regretted it.

So, if you have that wonderful friend or relative that you haven’t seen in a long, long time, don’t postpone that trip! Make time for that visit!

No regrets.

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And thanks for reading!  🙂

Unknown's avatar

Stay Prepared! Keep the Charge and Gas Up!

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A blog post, “It Took an Earthquake to Teach Me Preparedness and Priorities” from The Idea Bucket, regarding the recent earthquake in Nepal, brought something to mind. Namely, the things we often overlook when planning for an emergency.

Two of these are: Keeping your cell phones adequately charged up, and keeping an adequate amount of gas in your car.

I usually charge my phone if the battery level falls below 80 percent by day’s end, barring unusual circumstances, and when I travel; I always bring my chargers with me. And, I have a car charger for the phone, as well as one for my home. And this is a good idea, because you never know when you may need to use your cell phone at an unusual time. See Lesson 4 in “It Took an Earthquake to Teach Me Preparedness and Priorities” from The Idea Bucket.

I also keep my other electronics charged up as well, even though they are less likely to be needed in an emergency, possibly. If they are, I know I’m prepared.

And the car? Yes, I have read once or twice in the past that one should keep at least a quarter tank of gas in the car for emergency purposes. I usually fill up when my car’s gas gauge reaches the quarter tank level as it is. Occasionally, I do go past this, but most of the time, I do fill up at the quarter tank level.  Again, you never know, no matter how remote the possibility, when you may have to evacuate your town or city in the middle of the night due to some disaster and your car is the only ticket out.

So, don’t overlook these items when planning for emergencies. You have planned for emergencies, haven’t you?

Be safe!

If you like what you’ve read here, please let others know of this post, blog, and site!

And thanks for reading!  🙂

Unknown's avatar

Are all Lies Bad?

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Don’t you just hate being lied to? I sure do. But, and this is a big “but“, I haven’t been offended by all lies told to me. Why? Because some lies were told to keep pleasant surprises as surprises, for one.

Most lies are bad, but some are good. I was told that the club I belonged to was changing its meeting place. I went to the new place and was treated to a surprise party for my birthday one year. It was great! It happens all the time.

Also, we tell “white” lies. These are lies to avoid offending people or to prevent people, often older parents or grandparents from worrying. Can you imagine if we always spoke our thoughts. Saying to Aunt Marge, “Your hat looks dumb and too big for your head!”, when she asks you what you think, or saying, “Cousin Tom and his girlfriend lived together before they were married.” to your old-fashioned grandfather, or saying how dangerous your job in law enforcement can be to your worrying grandmother, will only cause trouble.

Of course, the truth may still come out and, in the above examples, the idea shouldn’t be to deny the truth as much as to lessen the full impact of the truth.

In that last example of your law enforcement career, God forbid if you are killed, everyone knows that your grandmother won’t accept the idea that you just decided to take a very long trip without any communication with her or anyone else when you’ve always been a stickler for keeping contact with all family members. What needs to be done is to gradually let her know what your career is and assure her that you are taking extra care to protect yourself.

But what these white lies can do is to prevent the truth from being too blunt. Instead, in all 3 examples, the truth can be brought out in stages so the recipients won’t suffer as much mental shock with the resulting tumult in the family.

And of course, your child home alone telling an inquiring stranger on the phone that you are home in the shower is also a very good lie.

So, there are times when the lie can be more helpful than the truth. Just something to think about.

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Thanks for reading!  🙂

Unknown's avatar

Freedom to Grieve

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There was a death in my family recently. Oftentimes, when there’s such a tragedy, people, especially those closest to the one who passed on, are bombarded with often well-meaning advice on how to grieve. They may hear things such as, “You have to cry”, or, “You must pray”, or “You must do this,… wear that…have this type of ceremony”, etc.

Luckily, for me, there was very little of this, for which I am grateful. You see, everyone grieves in their own way, and just because one grieves in any particular way that is different, doesn’t mean they love the deceased person any less. Not everyone has a funeral. Not everyone wears black. Not everyone grieves for the same amount of time or to the same degree all of the time.

So, to keep this short, my advice is, to let people grieve in their own way. Please. They’ll appreciate this as greater respect, and they are more likely to respect you in turn.

Thanks for reading.

If you like what you’ve read here, please let others know of this post, site, and blog. 🙂

 

Unknown's avatar

Let’s Hear it For Teachers!

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I remember one of my high school teachers saying that most people think that teachers simply open up kids’ heads, pour in the knowledge, and they’re done for the day. I’ve heard people not involved in teaching say that teachers have it easy, what with having the whole summer off, as well as two weeks at Christmas and a week at Easter, days that end at 3pm instead of 5pm, etc.

So, how true is this? Well the fact of the matter is that people have a real misconception about teachers, and, while it is true that there are, and have been, some really bad ones out there, the vast majority are good and are often unfairly tarred by the impressions that the bad apples, and administrators, leave on the public.

Let’s examine some of the myths regarding teachers:

Teachers get the holiday season and the whole summer off! 

Yes, they do, and it is a nice perk, but, unlike members of Congress, they don’t get paid for more than two or three weeks of it, about what an average worker would get for their 2-3 week vacation! Teachers have to manage their salaries so that they can cover the 2-2 1/2 months per summer where they aren’t paid.

Teachers just mostly talk all day at the kids, how simple is that! They have such an easy job!

If you’re more than 5 years old, you must have seen some kid somewhere act up. If you’re a parent, or old enough to be one, you know you have! Just imagine 25, 30, or often more kids and several are acting up, not listening, or just not getting it. And you realizing that they are not your kids, so you must show more restraint in how you handle them! Add in all the special things that a teacher needs to do besides talk. Such as explaining things, grading papers, talking to parents, dealing with the different personalities of each kid, pulling “playground duty” at recess and lunch, keeping the classroom in order, coming up with lesson plans, and of course, dealing with administrators, some of whom have never taught a class of any kind in their lives yet think they know everything. Which leads to the next myth,

Teachers’ days end at 3 pm while everyone else works til 5pm!

Class time may end at 3pm, but not the teacher’s day. They have papers to grade, lesson plans to be drawn up, oftentimes extra curricular activities to supervise, meetings, often mindless ones, that administrators make them attend, parental meetings, and special events to attend.

Teachers don’t teach and just want to be pals to the kids!

Certainly some are like this. But most are not. However, they are often prevented from enforcing much discipline and are restricted from teaching, or not teaching, certain subjects or in certain ways, by our PC mentality, overbearing and cowardly administrators, and sue happy parents of all stripes.

If you really think about it, and use the “Mental Hand” that I wrote about in my earlier post, The Mental Hand, you’ll see that teachers, especially good ones, have a really tough job.

I’m not saying that every time there’s a teachers’ strike or the threat of one, that the teachers are always right, but I do believe that they do deserve a respect, from the general public, that they don’t get today.

If you can read this post, especially if you can read it easily and understand it, thank a teacher!

If you like what you’ve read here, please let others know of this post, blog, and site!

And thanks for reading! 🙂