A To-Don’t List For Feeling Better About Yourself

We all have our bad days. Some more than others. While this is a normal thing and we inevitably go through some tough times that make us question our self-worth, we should not let the negativity take over our lives.

If we want to change the way we feel about ourselves and, ultimately, our situation, we need to not only do the right things but also stop doing the bad ones. Even if you keep doing the right things but you continue to live with the bad ones, you will just end up in a vicious cycle. It’s time to get rid of some of our negative reactions to life and its challenges.

10 Things to Stop Doing to Change the Way You Feel about Yourself for the Better

1. Don’t compare yourself with others.

So your colleagues’ quick-sale houses are moving faster than the ones on your listing. Your high school friends are doing extremely well in life while you’re still struggling to hold down a job. It might seem so easy to feel sorry for yourself and be envious of what they have.

Don’t. Stop comparing yourself to others. Your life and progress are your own journey. You go at your own pace. It is your race to finish, not theirs.

2. Don’t say “yes” if something doesn’t sit well with you.

One of the things that sometimes rob folks of joy is people-pleasing. This includes saying “yes” just to feel included and valued. But at what expense? It can lead to a life of compromise and instability. Put a stop to it. If you don’t agree with something, you can always say “no” and agree to disagree. Give it a try. It can be very liberating.

3. Don’t feel guilty about taking a break.

You’re not a machine that can keep going for hours on end. Even machines are put to rest regularly to delay wear-and-tear. As a human being, your energy reserves will run out — physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. You need to recognize when to stop and take a breather. It’s fine to take care of yourself, too.

4. Don’t be so hard on yourself.

Mistakes are natural for human beings. No one is perfect. We’re all flawed in our own unique way. If things don’t work out for you because of something you did (or did not do) or something you are (or are not), it’s okay. Pick up the pieces, learn the lesson, and move on as a better person.

5. Don’t convince yourself that you’re okay when you’re really not.

In some cases, we are our own worst enemy… well, at least our pride is. Pride makes us put on phony facades and keeps us from acknowledging our realities for fear of either pity or rejection.

It’s really okay to not be okay sometimes. You just need to embrace this fact and learn how to deal with it. The sooner you learn to accept things the way they are, the sooner you can get on the road to recovery.

6. Don’t let anything or anyone prevent you from making time to care for yourself.

Self-care is an important aspect of functioning well holistically and socially. They say that you can’t give what you don’t have. If you keep showing up for people but fail to do the same thing for yourself, how do you expect to give them your best? Take time to attend to your needs, too.

7. Don’t be afraid to speak up and be heard.

Most of the time, we don’t like speaking our minds because we feel like what we have to say doesn’t matter in the grander scheme of things. But know that your thoughts, opinions, and voice matters to those close to you. You’re seeing one side of the spectrum that could be their blind side. What you have to say can potentially be a life-changer.

8. Don’t break your promises.

Feeling good is sometimes based on the things you’ve accomplished. Making good on your word brings you opportunities to achieve and accomplish something significant to another person. It makes you more thoughtful about your decisions and actions which leads to greater self-confidence.

9. Don’t get insulted easily.

Sticks and stones may break your bones but words can make or break you. A lot of people have never recovered from a bad thing that was directed at them. In most cases, these insults have led to lifetime trauma.

You need to learn how to filter what people say about you. Stop taking every word hurled at you so seriously. Consider the source first. Sometimes, it has to do more with their issues and not you. Understand that hurt people hurt people. So instead of reacting to every negative word they say about you, choose to respond better and rise above it all.

10. Don’t stop living life.

Nobody promised that life is easy. You will face challenges that will require mountain-moving faith. But no matter how big those mountains are, just keep going. Don’t stop living for these circumstances are temporary.

Sometimes you don’t need to move the mountain at all. You just need to keep driving uphill until you overcome it. Once you’re past it, you’ll only see a small mountain in your rearview mirror. Don’t get easily overwhelmed.

As Dory from Little Nemo said, “Just keep swimming.”

We hope that you find these things helpful when you’re down. Life is too short and too beautiful to not fully enjoy. It’s time to get up and face life with a different attitude.

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